Life has a way of throwing things at people. For me, medical complications are at the top of the list for things that life has thrown at me. Additionally, life has thrown people into my life who have quickly stabbed me in the back. I have been forced to grow up and mature faster than I should have and, therefore, I have a different mindset from other girls my age. But, life has thrown something at me that I never expected to receive at this age.
I always dreamed about the perfect boyfriend. (I mean, what teenage girl doesn’t?) My desire to have a boyfriend was there but, if I was honest with myself, I wasn’t looking for one. I was perfectly content without one. Would I get jealous watching other couples in the hallway at school? No, it actually made me kinda sick. The boys that I go to school with are just that immature, childish boys; hardly worth my time. Even when I started working, I wasn’t expecting to find a boyfriend. I was there to earn money, not socialize. But, like I said, life has a way of throwing unexpected things, or people, at us.
I will always remember the day that I stood at work watching the newest team member training on the cash register. He looked shy, quiet, and very introverted. I don’t like to judge people but, in that moment, I was wondering why he was working the most social position if he was so shy. Things began to change though the more I worked with him. He was every bit as quiet and shy as he seemed but beneath all that I could see a man that, to me, was a human jigsaw puzzle. I don’t mean that in a bad way.
After a month or so of watching him, I decided that I wanted to talk to him. Being an extrovert, this was easy for me. We found common ground; discussing school and interests, finally settling on the topic of novel writing and English. We both shared information about our published novels and, in the end, I asked for his number; for work purposes and so that I could send him the information about my novels.
So there it started. We talked periodically throughout the next several weeks, with me starting the conversation. I read his novel, a memoir about a series of break-ups that he had gone through recently, and learned why he was such a puzzle. It was at that point I made two decisions. One, I would let him determine how far our relationship went. And two, I wanted to be there for him in the event he needed someone to talk to; but, I didn’t want to force him to talk to me.
We became friends by the beginning of January, a friend that I don’t ever want to lose. Additionally, I was beginning to develop feelings for him that I couldn’t quite understand. I will never forget the night of my seventeenth birthday as we laid on the couch together and he kissed me. Until then, I didn’t know what his feelings were exactly for me but after that I knew that he was attracted to me at the very least.
Unfortunately, life also threw the fear of losing him at me at the same time. When the situation presented itself, I knew that I may end up losing him to another girl. If I’d had to, I would have bottled my feelings for him and would have hoped that we could remain friends. As it happened though, life allowed he and I to remain together. Two months later, we were in a relationship.
So what is the point of this story? Life gives us lemons. Do we eat them straight or do we make lemonade? Through everything that life has thrown at me as my relationship with my boyfriend has progressed, I have learned a few things:
One- It is better to be friends first. By being friends, it allows the relationship to be stronger and based on the right reasons. Additionally, being friends makes the relationship more important to both parties.
Two- The physical age is not as important as the mental age. My boyfriend is six years older than I am but, when we are together, you’d never be able to tell. He is very mature for his age and that is not something that many women say very often about men. He has a huge heart and is caring once you prove yourself worthy of his affection. Because my maturity is so much higher than most girls my age it allowed me to wait for him to be ready to move forward. It also allows me to be there for him when he needs someone to talk to.
Three- Love comes in the most unexpected places. I never expected to find a boyfriend through my job but I did and I am completely okay with that. I love him more than anything in the world. I would do anything for him and I never, ever, ever want to lose him.
There’s a lot more that I have learned but there isn’t enough time in the world to write it all. So, in short…
I LOVE YOU, KEVIN. I WILL LOVE YOU FOREVER!!!!!
